Do you have what it takes to be a copywriter?

You might make a good copywriter, author or ghostwriter if you

  • refuse to textspeak, even when you’re actually texting.
  • but can throw in a bit of slang into your copy where necessary.
  • pay Attention to Capitalization when Writing emails.
  • are the one who your family turns to for obituaries.
  • end up being forced to fine-tune your friends’ cover letters.
  • curse more creatively than any of your coworkers.
  • have an answer to everything… although sometimes not until the following day.
  • spend ages deciding what to say on holiday postcards.
  • actually read the packaging and consult your doctor or pharmacist.
  • give books as Christmas presents.
  • have a tattoo some place embarrassing – but it’s an English quote, not a Chinese character.
  • constantly point out other people’s Freudian slips.
  • draft and redraft your love letters.
  • consider adjectives your enemy.
  • never use exclamation points!
  • and never end sentences with an ellipsis…
  • secretly write poetry or keep a diary.
  • take notes on the graffiti you find in public toilets.
  • proofread Facebook and Twitter posts multiple times.
  • wish you could answer in writing when people talk to you.
  • put the subtitles on when watching porn.
  • say things that you don’t mean, just to see how people react.
  • were always the one whose essays got read out loud in class.
  • make up your own bedtime stories for your children.
  • envy other people’s writing skills.
  • are already thinking about how you could improve this article.

Cover image via Unsplash (CC0)

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